Have you ever thought about your death? About when you are going to die, where you are going to die, and how you are going to die?
I used to think about it a lot. Unlike many others who picture themselves to die of old age, I always thought that I will die when I am young. Whenever I talked to my friends about it, they would get really uncomfortable and tell me that I was being pessimistic. But I knew I was not, I was just being realistic. Death can strike anytime, anywhere, to anybody in any way. It is how life works.
For the past 2 weeks, I had been reading Haruki Murakami’s Norwegian Wood. It was my first time reading a book by this author and I really enjoyed his writing. I am not sure if it is Murakami or the Japanese writing style, but the narration was so descriptive with beautiful words that I was absorbed into another world as I read through the pages. Without any spoiler, the story is about a young man’s coming-of-age as he fell in love with whom used to be his best friend’s girlfriend, when he met her again two years after the best friend’s suicide. Despite its light read with a good amount of humor, romance and typical college stuff, the topic of death and suicidal was a big theme in this story, and it made me think a lot about life.
Time is precious. While you may know that there are 24 hours in a day, and you may know of your deadlines and are able to calculate your time based on your availabilities; you don’t know when exactly you are going to run out of time; literally. It is a scary thought, but the truth is you’ll never know when death is going to strike you or your loved ones. There may be the rare occasion when you get to know that one’s time is limited due to sickness (I don’t know if I should say lucky or unlucky in that sense), but otherwise, you won’t know. And as we move on with our every day lives, the clock ticks by. As we work, read, eat, run, poop, and even as I am thinking of the right way to form this sentence and typing it out on my blog, the clock ticks by. Have you ever realized how precious this entity we call time is?
My previous blog post talks about how I try to make every day count. If you have known me for a while, you would also know that I take my bucket list very seriously. Part of the reason why I am so motivated to live life to the fullest was due to the fact that I think about death a lot, and I treasure my time a lot. I don’t want to get run over by a bus tomorrow and regret that I didn’t try hard enough to achieve my dreams or do things that I love. I want to be able to tell myself, “Wendy, there may be many things that you haven’t done, but you’ve utilized all the time you have and tried your best to be as happy as you can up till today. Just rest in peace.” And bam, my soul rises to heaven! *with halo sound effect as I fly in the sky with a cute white dress*? Of course, before that monologue happens, my hope is to be like Regina George and not die when I get run over by the bus. ?
As I started working part-time last month, I learned to appreciate my time so much more. With the piling work and responsibilities, I don’t get a lot of free time like I used to. I try to make the best out of them, but stress and fatigue would somehow lead me to rest and not do much. There were so many times when I wanted to blog during my free time but I ended up reading or sleeping or running instead. It is really challenging to blog after working and getting assignments done for the entire day, and it doesn’t help when the book that I was reading was so addictive either. Please forgive me as I adapt to my new schedule and plan my editorial calendar around it!
But yea, these are just some thoughts that I had after reading Norwegian Wood. To me, a good book is one that stimulates me to reflect on my own life after I finish reading it, and this book does exactly it. Hopefully this blog post reminds you to appreciate and treasure time even more, and forces you to think twice the next time you decide to sleep in or be late for a meeting, because you’re wasting everybody’s precious time. Till then!