A week ago, I went on a one-week trip to China because my sister was getting married. Nope, it’s not the wedding ceremony with all friends and family present, just the official registration in the marriage office. I’m glad to be there to witness this special moment for my sister and now brother-in-law since my parents couldn’t make it. My flight to Chongqing, the city that my brother-in-law grew up in, was about 18 hours in total with 3 hours transfer in Hong Kong/Beijing. Having flown from Malaysia to Canada for around the same duration in the past few years, I was quite used to this travel distance. In fact, I was quite excited to have some free, alone time after a couple months of being busy with school, work, and pre-graduation preparations.
As I was packing up my bags, I brought along my journal, laptop, and a book to go on the plane with me. My roommate joked that my backpack was heavier than my check in luggage, but that was because I had so much in mind to do instead of just sleeping and watching movies on the plane. Anyways, since first year when I started traveling long distance a lot, reflecting and writing when I travel has become like a ritual to me. I was really looking forward to it this time since I hadn’t had time to write in my journal for the past month. As I flipped through the pages, I came across my new year’s resolutions that I wrote earlier this year. It felt great to be reminded about them, and to know that I have achieved some of them and am on track for a few others.
I then went on to read through the other entries that I’d written in the past few months. They reminded me of my thoughts and emotions that I experienced, and how I overcame some of the issues that I feared of and wrote in my journal. It was amazing how by reading through my own words from a few months ago, I could learn so much about myself and life in general. I was also pleasantly surprised by my writing, by how smoothly they flow without me stressing out about my formatting or grammar like I do in my blog posts. They came out so naturally and read so smoothly, right from the bottom of my heart. And yes, I felt like I was conversing with myself as I read through my journal entries.
To be completely honest, I had been trying to blog for the past two months. I had a couple of blog posts drafted but none of them ever made it to be published. In the process of writing, I got too caught up with the right phrases and sentences and tones, then I got too caught up with the right timing to publish my posts to achieve highest organic reach and other technical social media stuff, that I lost the authenticity in my writing. I had been struggling with writer’s block for what felt like the longest time, and reading through my journal made me realize why it happened. That’s what got me blogging here again today.
Instead of focusing on the marketing side of my blog, I want to focus on myself, on the real purpose that I blog – which is to share my thoughts and experiences with you, my readers, my friends. I had been blogging for almost 8 years now, and I know that it’s stuck with me because I genuinely enjoy sharing about my life and connecting with others through it. I shouldn’t stress too much about being perfect (in my writing) if I want to be authentic. As the quote on my journal says, I’m too blessed to be stressed. I hope that by channeling my stress on my blog away, the words are going to come to me like word canons again, and then I get to blog more frequently as I’d like to again.
I’m so glad that I still choose to journal although I already have a blog. It’s just different to write about your feelings and emotions on pen and paper, and have them stored in a place that only you have access to. Funny enough, this journal was a gift from my sister who got married, the very one that I was on my way to visit when I read (and write on) it on the plane. It’s such a coincidence that it came up and helped me at this very particular moment hey? Almost feels magical! ✨✨